Idiot Town

I learned at a young age, like 4 or 5, to lie to the police or any other adults who asked me a question, when I knew a truthful answer would get me in trouble. Here are some examples:

My Mom asked me, “Did you break the cookie jar?”
My answer was of course “NO”. Who the hell would cop to something they did if no one saw them do it, especially since I had a brother and a sister who could share the blame? The folks couldn’t beat all three of use, right? (I actually found out later that that assumption was “wrong”, they could beat all three of you if no one copped to the crime.)

“Do you know how fast you were going?”
“How long where you following me officer?”
“8 miles.”
“Uhhhhh, 8 miles? Uhhh, no, I have no idea how fast I was going.”
Of course, he still gave me the ticket, but I sure as shit wasn’t going to tell him that, “Yea, I knew I was going 105 mph sucka, I had it on cruise control.” (True Story! That one actually happened to me in California when I was a kid, the officer leaned in the window, tapped me on the chest and said, “You were going 65 in a 55 son, and don’t you ever let me catch you going that fast again!” It cost me $35, and I’m still grateful to that cop.)

You never tell anyone you did anything. That way they have to prove you did it. That said, did you see today where Senator Stabenow’s husband, Tom Athans, co-founder of the liberal TalkUSA Radio network, admitted to cops who had just pulled him over, that “yes, he had just had sexual relations with a prostitute”. They didn’t even have to beat him with rubber hoses or anything, he just admitted it and then they let him drive away. Taking responsibility for your actions is OK, but why tell people what your actions were if they don’t know for sure?

I’m sure his wife’s real proud about now… Can you say Dumbass?